Come Sail Away: Recent rains call for an ark! - - Columbia, South Carolina |

Come Sail Away: Recent rains call for an ark!

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You've probably been talking about it and walking through it: the seemingly endless gallons of rain pouring forth from the skies above.

But who can stop it? Nobody apparently. For what seems like all summer, it's been coming down in buckets. And if you haven't had to work in it, you've at least had to walk through it.

And guess what!? It's not over.

So before the Soda City goes down the drain, I'm getting out of here by the most logical and realistic means: an ark.

Now all I need is two of every animal.

First stop is City Roots for some vittles. They'd like a break from the rain, too.

Despite what you may think, City Roots' Eric McClam says the monsoonish conditions in South Carolina can be problematic, to say the least.

The smallest issue: not as many tikes like to come pick blueberries and blackberries.

The rain's doing a number on their tomatoes and other vegetables.

"We're seeing some disease problems due to the moisture, a little bit of cracking in the fruit, basically too much moisture," said McClam.

Then there are the insects and the problem of tractors bogging down.

"We can't really use any of our cultivation equipment because it's too wet," said McClam. "It's really just a pain."

A pain I'll soon be free of. Our next stop is Ace Hardware for, well, the hardware. And caulk. I bet arks need a lot of caulk.

Manager Donnie Wheelis hasn't done any shipbuilding, but he has helped folks with the usual rain-related fixes.

"They discover their roof is leaking, so they buy a lot of roof cement," said Wheelis.

By the way, it has been wetter than average, but we haven't come close to records. It just seems much worse because of the recent drought.

I've had enough, and there's room onboard as long as you can, you know, build a boat.

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